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sandy
#81 Posted : Friday, 21 August 2009 11:15:00 a.m.(UTC)
sandy

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Lovely postings everyone,John sometimes it's good to reflect on the people we were when we were gambling to appreciate the little things in life.It's not how many breathes we take but what takes our breathe away.
God you certainly made me think about the state I was in.
Back to the Specialist again today some good news would be nice.
Sorry I don't have time to talk to you all individually but I will post again later.
Great going everyone!!!
john
#82 Posted : Saturday, 22 August 2009 11:11:00 a.m.(UTC)
john

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Sandy hope its good news for you .
Today is an ok day Just made an appointment for dentist need filling.went by the way with lack of money before ,slowly but surely will catch up.
Going out tonight for dinner, nice change . No news
Hope you are all feeling good take care thinking of you all

john
kimy
#83 Posted : Saturday, 22 August 2009 2:38:00 p.m.(UTC)
kimy

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hi everyone well i dont actualy feel good about myself at all feel like a total failure to myself let alone this site. Yes i gambled damm it all i have banned myself from every last place up here now AS it was bought to my attention that i had missed three,places i had never thought of or even been to until now. IM SO SO SORRY THAT I HAVE LET EVERYONE DOWN.I am being so hard on myself and maybe i should it was such a stupid thoughtless thing for me to do. Once again i am so sorry.damm it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
hocko
#84 Posted : Saturday, 22 August 2009 4:09:00 p.m.(UTC)
hocko

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Hi Everyone,
Kimy, I'm so sorry to hear that you slipped, but you definitely have not let us down. You have been honest about your slip and you know that you have been doing so well and will pick yourself up and start again. It's a good thing that you have banned from all venues now, as that will give you peace of mind. DON'T BE SO HARD ON YOURSELF!!! Think of all the progress you have made and that should make you feel a bit better. John, I also went to the dentist today - a very expensive trip as I had cracked a molar and it had to be capped. However, we need to keep our teeth as false ones aren't a good option. It would have been a lot worse expense wise if we had still been gambling. Sandy, I hope you get a good report from your doctor this time as it's been a long time getting over your op. I'm pleased that you also seem to be in a better frame of mind. Julia, good to hear you are doing well also. I'm still gamble free, keeping busy and loving life again. At the rate I'm painting the house, I have many months work to keep me out of mischief. Take care all.
john
#85 Posted : Saturday, 22 August 2009 5:07:00 p.m.(UTC)
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Hi kimy Sorry to hear you have slipped You are not a failure to us You have not let this site down Dont worry about what we feel, its what you feel,
We are here to help pick up the pieces and show that it can be done.
Try to remember how bad you feel when you want to do it again.
like sandy i have never self banned, because i through gambling have become devious and will always be able to find a way, Even though if i felt like i was losing control i would ban from places likely to go.Definately would help if strong urges but has to come from me honestly wanting to stop.
Remember how you feel now and next time you want to be honest and ask yourself do you want to feel this bad again.
Concentrate on the simple things and it will get better.
Sorry if this sounds hard but i want you to succeed ,I feel for you.
You will stop . it can take some slips .
It needs to be now.Stay positive

Hocko you sound good ,same as me keeping busy seems to work it seems to get better Take care.

john
julia
#86 Posted : Sunday, 23 August 2009 4:27:00 p.m.(UTC)
julia

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Dont worry about it Kimy. I found several places after i had self banned and slipped into them one night.
Of course i banned myself afterwards but i wasn't happy with myself.
I think it was kind of like giving up smoking but leaving a packet hidden in the house "just in case".
Ive been a bit naughty with the online lotto and keno.
Will have to shut that down soon....
Take care out there everyone xxj
john
#87 Posted : Monday, 24 August 2009 11:06:00 a.m.(UTC)
john

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hi to all. kimy and julia Hope you are having a good weekend . kimy Please keep posting even when you are in a slip mode, by posting we might be able to help. i know when this is happening its the last thing you feel like doing but it might help you to feel not so alone
Julia you dont sound so good stay strong if i can do it you can thinking of you both take care.
Hocko you sound like in my space. something clicks and the time is right. This is how i felt the first time so i know this is it .You still get the urges every now and then less often and they fade faster i am so pleased you are back in the rel world i love being here again.





john
sandy
#88 Posted : Monday, 24 August 2009 8:06:00 p.m.(UTC)
sandy

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Kimy and Julia in my job we don't say so and so is bi-polar we say they have bi-polar 2 very differnt things.If we say they are bi-polar we are definning them by their disorder and not as a person if you get my drift. We are not gamblers we are people with a gambling problem quite different.Like any illness we don't want it we have relapses and it frustrates the life out of us.
Kimy this site is not competitive you don't let anyone down when you slip we are all only $20 or whatever away from doing what you do.Your honesty makes you courageous far from letting anyone down.Maybe sometimes we just need a reminder of why we want to stop and that was a slip is something to harden your resolve to keep working on it.It is a work in progress sometimes and for some total abstances doesn't always work.
God I know how you feel and if I could I would make you feel better but you have to concede at least your life is no longer gambling daily so pu in perspective how well you have done.
The only thing on the site I ever feel let down about is when someone posts a desperate post,you bend over backwards to try and help and never hear from them again.
We are a team and you are a huge part of that as are you Julia!You have tripped not slipped just as I say a reminder of why you hate gambling.
john
#89 Posted : Tuesday, 25 August 2009 8:44:00 a.m.(UTC)
john

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hi to all Sandy good to hear from you how was your visit to the doctor.
Hocko i hope you achieved a lot over the weekend.
Kimy turn your negative slip thought around ,and this is working towards the final giving up I believe if i hadnt slipped etc i would never have stopped It reminds you how bad it leaves you feeling.
Julia please take control before you reach rock bottom do you want to go their.
Sandy i agree about desperate ones that you never hear from again obviously they are not ready or low enough but it would be nice to hear what happens
Had a good weekend love the garden flowers at the moment full of magnolias and camellias so lovely nature never appreciated it while gambling heres to a positive day all

john
hocko
#90 Posted : Tuesday, 25 August 2009 2:11:00 p.m.(UTC)
hocko

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Hi everyone, Sandy, good to hear from you and your words of wisdom. I hope life is treating you better these days. Julia, isn't this addiction a shocker. You no sooner stop playing the pokies and it leads you towards lotto & keno. I think you should "nip this in the bud" so to speak, as it could lead you down the same path as the pokies. We're here behind you so be strong. Kimy, are you feeling more positive now? I hope you are and you should be proud of how far you have come and not beat yourself up. John, I know what you mean about appreciating the garden as it's a hobby I love but put aside when I was gambling all the time. I now get a very serene feeling when I'm in my garden and it's as if I see it through new eyes. I had a really good weekend, with more maintenance on the house, a great sense of satisfaction, and not even a thought about gambling. I know I'm on the road to recovery and it feels so good. Take care everyone.
john
#91 Posted : Wednesday, 26 August 2009 8:19:00 a.m.(UTC)
john

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Julia and kimy how are you going . hope you both are having a good day.
Hocko serene is a good word to describe it.
My next goal is to lose 8 kilos. I lost 26 after gambling but have put 8 on so dealing to that now there is always something to battle. have a good day all

john
hocko
#92 Posted : Wednesday, 26 August 2009 11:56:00 a.m.(UTC)
hocko

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Hi everyone, I hope you are all doing well. John, I have just lost 17 kilos and feel wonderful. Eating must be my other addiction as I don't smoke, drink to excess, bet on horses etc. All the best with your diet - you'll be a new man when you are finished. Take care.
john
#93 Posted : Thursday, 27 August 2009 9:08:00 a.m.(UTC)
john

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Hi to all Hocko the joys of an addictive personality you have to think about everything you do maybe thats what gambling taught me. Feeling great now controlling my food intake. The good addition i have is walking hills 5 ks a day probably be huge if i didnt. Feeling on top and in control .

Julia and kimy how are you both going please let us know as i think about you both and wonder how yiou are getting on.

Have a good day all


john
hocko
#94 Posted : Thursday, 27 August 2009 6:39:00 p.m.(UTC)
hocko

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Hi everyone,
John, good to hear you feel in control and you sound so positive. Walking not only keeps the weight off but gets those endorphins going to make you feel good. Kimy, Julia and Sandy, hope you are all doing well. I've had the flu for the last 5 days, hence I've been a bit lazy with the renovations. I thought I should give my body time to heal before tackling them again. Instead of going at it all day, I've been doing small things and then resting. Take care everyone.
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