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newmum
#1 Posted : Thursday, 4 June 2009 11:15:00 a.m.(UTC)
newmum

Rank: Newbie

Groups: Registered
Joined: 3/06/2009(UTC)
Posts: 1

My husband is a gambler. I have tried to talk to him about it and offer my support but he continues to disappoint me and gamble. I now have control of the eftpos card, but he still manages to get money from the account. He was hiding a credit card and had been taking the eftpos card from my purse without me knowing.I give him 'pocket money' for spending.Over the years he has taken upwards of 30 thousand dollars from our savings for gambling on the pokies. That's not counting the money from our daily cheque accounts. I'm on maternity leave with a 4 month old and finally at my wits end. I don't know what to do or say anymore. i'm too embarrassed to tell my family, because I know they'll want to know why I've stayed around so long. It's making me feel depressed and i'm sick of feeling so awful. He tells me that if he has to go to councilling he'll loose his job. I want him to be a man that our baby will look up to and respect one day. He told me that he tries to stop but it's too hard. Please help!
anonymous
#2 Posted : Thursday, 4 June 2009 11:15:00 a.m.(UTC)
anonymous

Rank: Advanced Member

Groups: Registered
Joined: 1/08/2012(UTC)
Posts: 1,640

Hello and welcome Newmum to the site. It seems very frustrating and scary for you at the moment.

Telling friends and family can be very hard and so can missing out on the support you need. If you have not already you can try calling the Gambling Helpline (0800 654 655)for a chat and to look at some options. We at the Gambling Helpline are here to support you. There is also great support and experience here on the forum too from other posters.

Well done for posting and sharing. Please feel free to continue posting here.

GH Admin.
toomuch
#3 Posted : Thursday, 4 June 2009 11:15:00 a.m.(UTC)
toomuch

Rank: Newbie

Groups: Registered
Joined: 3/06/2009(UTC)
Posts: 3

I took over the finances awhile back so my gambler partner didn't have any money, except pocket money which was drip fed. I am feeling the same as you newmum. I don't have anyone to tell this to. It is embarrassing to let your family and friends know and what do you say to them and you already know what they will tell you..leave them and all your problems will be gone. Right? Difficult to do that also when you love this person so much and want to help them and they don't realise they are hurting you from their lies and secrets. I try my best to keep my finances afloat. We have a joint account and both have a eftpos card to access the account. However, everytime there seems to be funds in there, it is spent. So now, I ensure there is no funds in the account unless needed to pay bills. How do you stop them from getting loans out behind your back? opening bank accounts without your knowledge and setting up payments for their loans that way. I have no legal right to stop this from happening and the loan companies are loving this. I worked really hard to get rid of our credit card bills so that we could start saving for a house. Well when there were no more credit card bills, i find out that there's been loans taken out left right and centre. Do they care about us? What's it like to not have money and struggle for the rest of your life? Why don't they appreciate the fact that they work hard for their money and therefore shouldn't just blow it by pushing a few buttons on the pokies or playing against the casio??
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